Communicating with colleagues and staff

So, I’ve explored listening when you are networking, then when building relationships and followed by working with customers. But what about your colleagues and staff – how well do you listen to them? I have encountered many people who are great at networking, marketing, selling, building relationships, making referrals, managing clients ….. and absolutely not great at working with staff and colleagues. They appear to switch off all their skills, when they are not with the external contacts.

Having said that, most people aren’t that extreme – but many do not employ their skills consistently. If you ask them why they behave differently, they don’t always understand what they are doing and why it’s a problem – after all, “the customer is king” and “the customer is always right”.

Yes, we wouldn’t exist in any business or organisation if we didn’t have customers, or (for a public service, there needs to be someone to receive that service), yet there are very few roles which can deliver a service completely in isolation, so we need to work together. If it’s vital to listen and communicate well with customers, surely it is equally vital to listen and communicate well with staff and colleagues AND suppliers?

Find Sue on LinkedIn and at http://www.suecohen.co.uk/
Contact sue@suecohen.co.uk

Taking messages for colleagues

I was discussing business calls with my 18 year old son recently - rare though it might be to have a sensible discussion with a teenager. He had answered my office phone while I was on another call and taken a message - name, number, business :)

The discussion was around what he might have said if I hadn't been there and he suggested "I'll get her to phone you when she's back", which is something many receptionists, secretaries and well-meaning colleagues say. Except that he

• wouldn't necessarily know when I would be back
• what I would be doing on my return which would take priority
• what other reasons I may have for not calling straight back

I suggested he said that he would pass the message on when she returns and, if he knows, when he expects that to be - with a little leeway. So, it's fine to say that he's unsure if I'd be back before the end of the day or to ask when the caller would prefer a return call. I want to ensure that he does not (over)promise on my behalf. I reminded him that the line does have an answerphone which I check regularly and he does not have to answer the call.

On an obvious level, are your staff and colleagues skilled at taking messages? On a less obvious level, do they work as a team to support and help each other in such a way that this is just not an issue? Or does poor message-taking hide something else? Call Sue if you'd like to discuss ways of finding out what is really going on and what you can do to encourage the behaviours you want.

Find Sue on LinkedIn and at http://www.suecohen.co.uk/
Contact sue@suecohen.co.uk or on  07971 400653

Listening to your customers

If listening is core to communication and building relationships with new contacts, what about maintaining relationships with existing customers? No doubt we all deal with call centres for many of our services and have horror stories to tell of relayed phone conversations and repitition and hanging on ...

Yet, many people have DDI service and personal voicemail, in businesses of all sizes with, or without, reception and secretarial back up - how well do they use these facilities?

I called someone recently, with a senior role in a medium-sized organisation, using his DDI. His voicemail message was fine, except that it wasn't dated and I wanted to know if he was around that day, so I dialed 0 for reception and asked if he was in. She just put me straight back through to his line and voicemail!

Some people set their voicemail message daily or weekly and others don't, with a promise to call back "as soon as I can" or "within three hours" maybe "the next working day". And many people have a system for checking each others' messages and either passing them on or placing a holding call.

Needless to say "as soon as I can" or "within three hours" become meaningless very quickly, when they are not returned. If your customers struggle to get through to you when they need to, for whatever reason, what will stop them going elsewhere? And, if you answer the phone for others, as a colleague or a receptionist, listen carefully to the caller and what they want, before just putting them through.

If you would like independent views on your telephone answering service or help building the communications culture you want, call us.

Find Sue on LinkedIn and at http://www.suecohen.co.uk/
Contact sue@suecohen.co.uk or on 07971 400653

Communication is more than listening

Communication is also about how you put your own message across for others to listen to. Start with the words and think carefully about the message you want to get across, then the voice, then the body language.

If you need to give your opinion, then make it clear for example use “I”, not “we”, unless you are truly speaking for a group.

When you need to give a serious message or bad news, keep your face fairly static, your tone even and firm and your gestures to a minimum. Then, with a positive message, be more animated and cheerful.

It sounds straightforward written like that, but it takes development. These skills can be developed with practice and training. Contact Sue for ideas on developing your communication skills.


Find Sue on LinkedIn and at http://www.suecohen.co.uk/
Contact sue@suecohen.co.uk

Listening on screen / paper

And that’s where we have a problem. How many times have you read an email / online posting / letter and thought “I don’t like the tone of that” or similar?

 I thought vocal tone had to be heard … What happens to your message when you rely on the written word instead of a phone-call or a meeting?

Try this exercise. Read the following statement out loud, with the emphasis on a different word each time and then decide what it really means.

I didn’t say he’d stolen the cash.


Listening is a key part of communication skills which can be developed with practice and training. Contact Sue for ideas on developing communication skills.


For more on the exercise, click here


Find Sue on LinkedIn and at http://www.suecohen.co.uk/
Contact sue@suecohen.co.uk

Listening on the telephone

I met someone recently who does a lot of telephone research and many people have had first interviews on the phone. So, how do you listen well when you can’t see the person? Some people think it should be easier to concentrate on just one channel of communication, without being distracted.

Unfortunately, many people don’t concentrate better when they are on the phone – they distract themselves by looking at their emails, or looking around them. As an alternative, make notes during the conversation, even if you don’t think you will need to keep them. And we are used to interacting with people when we see them and use the visual information to make our decisions (whether this is conscious or not).

Talk, and gesture, normally – they can’t see you, but the effect translates into your voice. Observe others on the phone and pay attention to how they sound when they sit, hunched over their desks, eyes on their pc compared to the ones sitting up, making notes and smiling and nodding throughout.

Listening is a skill – it can be developed with practice and training. Contact Sue for ideas on developing your listening skills.

Find Sue on LinkedIn and at http://www.suecohen.co.uk/
Contact sue@suecohen.co.uk

Listening - THE way to build relationships

Oft quoted is the phrase “two ears, one mouth, use in those proportions”. If you want to demonstrate you are really listening, then I would aim for something closer to 80:20. Ask a question and ……… pause. If you’ve just met them, then ask what they do and follow-up to show you are really paying attention. If most people are in the same position, they will flip the question back to you in a fairly short space of time and ask you.



Listening is an activity, not a spectator sport.

Click here for tips on Active Listening



Find Sue on LinkedIn and at http://www.suecohen.co.uk/
Contact sue@suecohen.co.uk